apparare: (◇ sai tok)
b⃫e⃫n⃫ ⃫s⃫o⃫l⃫o⃫ KYLO REN ([personal profile] apparare) wrote 2016-04-21 12:48 am (UTC)

( The way that she views these monolithic figures that bookmark certain points of his life - Organa, Solo, Skywalker - sits in such stark opposition to the way that Kylo perceives them that it consistently puts him on the defensive any time there is so much as an implication as to their characters. In some ways, he can understand why Rey would look at them the way that she does: her experience with them is in complete contrast to his own. These are the people, the faces, the warm arms and full hearts that accepted a nobody made of sand and spare parts. Solo had endeared himself enough to her that she easily thought of him when prompted to fill the hole of a missing father, and Leia's kindness and acceptance in the face of her diligence and dedication, how rigid and unflinching and strong she can be, has certainly struck a cord with Rey as well. Skywalker is less difficult, still, to reason out, considering what he represents, what he can show her, what he can give her.

Kylo has none of those same experiences, and as a result he has none of that faith. The father who might have loved him but didn't understand or know what to do with him, how to relate; a mother too absorbed in the rest of the galaxy and too afraid of her own inadequacies and culpability in what her son was becoming to take it upon herself to fix it; and Skywalker an uncle who pushed and pushed in the only way he knew how, thinking he was doing the best that he could, only to have it shatter in a radius that took down an entire generation of possibility. Kylo is responsible for his own actions, who he is, and he knows that, but the assumptions that he makes are based in a history that Rey might never know, might never understands. Not rose colored glasses, necessarily, but she's been afforded a new lens through which to peer at the world as those three people inhabit it; his own perspective isn't as forgiving.

He isn't expecting to have attention drawn to his injuries, especially not after the volume and severity of their argument - it wouldn't be surprising if they shattered a few windows or fueled the fire in some way - but Kylo can't deny that he isn't exactly eager to return to the Resistance, as previously mentioned. Level enough with Rey to peer down at her if he leans slightly to the side, in her direction, he doesn't invade her personal space with his body language but comes close enough that he can see the precise way the orange light of the fire bends the shadows around her face. )


Famous last words, scavenger. ( His tone his much more mellow than it had been, though it carries the sharp edge associated with the death of screaming matches only moments prior. Finished but hardly forgotten. ) Are you sure you want to spend anymore time in the company of a monster?

( It might as well be a rhetorical question, since he already knows the answer. He gets the sense that without actively trying, it will be very unlikely that they are able to keep most things from one another in the future. )

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