Something like that. [ She's still somewhere back at conquering the vague vertigo he'd pressed upon both of them at the viewport, space a vacuous mass that leaves her spinning in her own bunk, quelling the brief dizzy spell in favor of focusing on Kylo's voice in her head, even and far from friendly but conversational just the same. She's there when he pulls his lightsaber to him from across the room, watches with the oddest sense of both presence and distance, not sitting beside him but there just the same. Watching him dismantle his chaotic saber is fascinating, and Rey is a quick study, honing in on the minute details, piece by piece, nudging the back of his wrist when she notices something peculiar. ]
Why haven't you improved your lightsaber? I know you could. It's too unpredictable. [ Like you are. Like I am. Footnotes to her curious but well meant question, Rey unintentionally shifts a few scattered images across at him, like pressing a handful of photographs across an empty table, a small change here, tightening a bolt here, a little re-wiring there. Luke Skywalker has shown her how to construct a lightsaber, only one demonstration being enough for Rey to catch on, remembering the subdued swell of surprised pleasure in the Jedi's mood at her success. Her suggestions lack force or superiority, a mechanic simply offering their input to make something more successful, despite the irony of potentially giving an enemy the upper hand on her in a fight.
Only— Rey realizes with a private start that she hasn't considered Kylo Ren the enemy in weeks. Even this conversation, the both of them restless and awake but civil, leaves her quietly reeling, tucking away this gentle ebb of surprise somewhere he can't quite see. Just because she's not actively loathing him doesn't mean she trusts him at all, too connected, too deeply woven into the First Order for any kind of comfort ( still— she's under the impression that isn't his first priority. And neither is hunting her down. ) ]
( He ignores her for a moment, annoyed with her question more than he finds himself annoyed at her for asking it. Kylo pulls the metallic framework of his saber apart piece by piece, some of the components hovering next to his head in midair while others he sets on the table in front of him. It isn't long before he has a small spread before him. When he reaches the crystal, split nearly in half very similar to the way his face has been, he removes it with careful precision and the sort of delicate attention that he gives to little else in the known universe. In his hand, the unstable power of the small thing feels warm and heavy. It clunks lightly against the tabletop when he sets it down, and his thumb ghosts over the activation lever until the metal warms beneath his fingerprint. Dismantled, nothing happens, and a part of him naturally reaches out to ensure that the door to his private suite is well and truly locked, held fast with a small blockade of focus. )
Define improve.
( The innards so exposed, he switches tools to begin working on cleaning the crossguard vent, worried that the damage she had done in cutting the damn thing nearly in two on Starkiller might have affected the quillon that hadn't taken the brute force of her momentary ferocity. The memory is not so distant that he can't recall it in acute detail now, the tight set of her shoulders and the blue, jagged beam of his grandfather's saber in her hand washing her in bright light as he lay in the snow. The self-loathing and anger directed both inward and outward had come later, had wrecked medbay and killed a deck officer.
He's a touch calmer in the days and weeks since, that much more so when concentrating on the task at hand: a tricky balance with her in his mind as if she's always been there. That thought in itself is disconcerting, as are the implications behind it. Kylo pops a bit of grit out of the crossguard vent and blows sharply into the apparatus to clear it of any remaining detritus. )
It's served me just fine in place of the lightsaber that you stole from me. ( He gets the impression both from her and instinctively that she would be good at this, catching flits of images of her hands, small and stained, fitting pieces together with ease, a mechanic's intuition that affords her a measure of superiority that he never had, obvious in the instability of the blade he carries now. When he pops the shroud back on in a way that doesn't compromise the internal wiring the way it had after he'd repaired it, Kylo only stops to consider the possible source as Rey for no longer than it takes to be rid of it. He swallows and starts on the other emitter, annoyed and angry. ) It worked fine when that friend of yours got in my way, at least.
( The opposite emitter shroud pops off with a loud click! in the silence of the room. )
[ There's a very long moment where she's almost pleased, where they are so in sync with each other that Kylo automatically does exactly what she's thinking, fitting a piece of his saber back into place just as she would have done and unintentionally suggests he do– before he ruins it, he brings up Finn, and she prickles, bristles physically and across the tightly knit bond between them that only seems to strengthen daily, dual hackles raising as she grits her teeth and makes some feeble attempt to quell her own anger, Master Skywalker's even keeled voice in her head.
It duels viciously with the reverberating memory of Finn's hollow screams through a snowy wood, ripping her back to consciousness only to watch him be sliced up the spine cleanly in one fell swoop, seeing red in her vision, the primal, instinctual drive to stand and call that lightsaber to her hand. ]
Be. Careful, Ren. I didn't steal anything. If memory serves, this saber came to me, not you. And if you touch any of them again...
[ Her voice is a low growl knocking about his head, less angry and threatening as it is a promise. Too many long nights she'd spent, cheek pillowed across the bow of her own arm at his bedside, willing him to stir, to heal faster, to open his dark eyes and look at her and smile stupidly, BB-8 at her heels, Poe often on the other side of the bed, sleeping just as fitfully, impatient.
Poe doesn't so much speak about his time spent so very hospitably aboard the Finalizer, but there are glimpses she catches from him, shoulder to shoulder in the mess hall, or when his palm fits comfortably over the backs of her knuckles, and she knows. This bond between them will not make her less forgiving.
Still, even as she grumbles irritably around his head, her presence is an even, calm entity, nearly beside him, as if she's in her sleeping clothes and slumped across the table from him, giving him half hearted cranky little directions. ]
( Kylo feels her anger, peckish and whipcrack quick, thrum through the bond like an electric charge, and he feels her try to tamp it back down, smothering it under stone and boot heel, no doubt a product of her tutelage under Skywalker. He gives the barest hint of a suggestion, a slight blow on the embers of the rage she feels, encouragement to embrace it and use it the way that he knows that she can, but doesn't let thought become well-formed in any capacity. This close to the Supreme Leader's seat, the last thing Kylo wants is some echo of his nudging her in that way apparent in the screen of his mind, available for Snoke to pick through and determine what this is before he has the chance to do so himself, to be ordered what to do with it before he can arrive at that conclusion on his own.
So he tempers the urge to encourage her down into a tiny flicker of amusement. It's easily disguised and easily cast off once his attention turns back to the task at hand: a steady balance of the pieces of his saber spread across from him and the intrusion of her in his mind, which tips more in her favor when she opens her mouth across the channel again and catches him cold. The tool in his hand skips over a ridge in his saber and something catches and pulls, springs free and rolls onto the floor and under the table. Kylo calls it back to him with no amount of gentleness, with such force that the little piece smacks into his hand with more speed than necessary. He fumes, to say the least. )
Making hollow threats like that is pointless. It's only a matter of time before we all cross paths again, and we are actually on opposite sides.
( In the case of FN-2187, Kylo intends to right the wrong he was unable to last time. Treason isn't something tolerated in any branch of the First Order, and given what his betrayal had cost the Order, had cost the Supreme Leader, had cost Kylo, he has every intention of seeing the proper amount of retaliation carried out. Her calmness, in the meantime, that neutral state she slips back into as if willing herself there purposefully under the banner of that heavy threat of 'or else,' unnerves him, especially when imposed upon him in such a way that he can't shake free.
He sets his teeth against the inside of his cheek and focuses on reassembling his saber, reluctant to believe that his quick reconstruction is at all due to her presence and the half-hearted attempts at guidance she affords him without either of them being acutely aware of it. He's quiet for a long time until finally the last piece clicks back into place and he busies himself with the task of replacing the tools into the pouch. It isn't until he's beyond the viewport and tucking the tool kit back into the drawer that he casts out for her again with a certain amount of directness. )
And I'd prefer if you dealt with me, not them. [ Still wary but in obvious control of her own emotions for the moment, Rey catches that flicker of revenge licking across their connection— not honed in on herself, in particular, but a side swapping stormtrooper. It puzzles her privately, unable to fathom why the loss of one good soldier irks him so, and she's starting to seriously consider what kind of stock Kylo Ren puts on loyalty. More than she'd initially understood. He's too easy to read and an enigma all at once and now that she's in his head and he's in hers, Rey sometimes finds it difficult not to try and parse him, even from star systems away, typically resisting the urge to feel out across their strange bond, but not always.
And so, she's quiet as he meticulously reassembles his lightsaber, careful as he puts his tools back in their proper places, his mind oddly quiet until she can feel that invisible nudge, a firm question with far less bite yet still demanding an answer. It gives her pause, blinking up at the starless ceiling above her, still jarring to wake some nights with a proper roof over her head. ]
I'm not sure. [ It doesn't bother her to admit, the voice in his mind muted and quiet, contemplative. ] You're just... here. It's easy. [ —to talk like this, a habit Rey fully realized and accepts is bother risky and dangerous, a novice brand of confidence keeping her from being too frightened by the prospect of slipping over to his side. Curiously, she shifts the very same question back to him, momentarily stunned by the broad expanse of endless space when he approaches the viewport once more. It isn't to retrieve any hidden information for the Resistance, or for his mother, but rather something she's wanted to know since this all began, a hooded, menacing terror in her vision, come to life in a shrouded wood. ]
What do you want? You don't really seem the type for galactic domination. You seem to have your own agenda. Including me in it also doesn't seem out of the question for you yet.
( That control is an advantage that he doesn't have, although he gets the distinct impression that it's something that will definitely come up during his tenuous stay on Snoke's base of operations. The whole ship is nervous. It beats like a separate, physical heart. Despite their dedication and loyalty to the Order, the troopers and even the upper-echelon figures aboard the Finalizer always get tense when they're this close to the Supreme Leader's seat, even if they are only making a drop-off, so to speak, depositing Kylo and a few other Knights on the home world so that Kylo can finish what was started. The troopers are the worst of them all, he can feel it, possibly in the wake of FN-2187's desertion, his betrayal, as if they all might be punished for his misdeeds.
He hardly concerns himself with any of it, sticking to his quarters the way he typically does on long journeys, emerging only to see that Hux hasn't ruined something else in an effort to get them all disciplined. The silence he's granted affords him time to recollect following his disasters on Starkiller and Jakku, in dealing with Rey and losing the droid, to reevaluate all of his mistakes and failures so that they do not happen again. He uses the time away from the bridge to gather to him what he might say to the Supreme Leader, what reasons he might give for the choices that he made. Hux had warned him not to let his personal interests interfere with orders, but he had, and he knows that. It's a crime that he will absolutely be punished for, even if he was attempting to kill two birds with one stone without knowing it. Retrieve the map and bring Snoke a girl with more Force-sensitivity than he had ever encountered.
He'd neglected to do both, and now he has her in his head, flitting around like a bird, keeping him awake through the night cycle and peppering him with questions, offering guidance and suggestions in mechanics. He presses his mouth into a thin line, and the door to the cabinet slams. )
My suggestion is that you find a way to make me not here, unless you're interested in what happens as a result. ( She's right, of course. Not in so many ways but in the ones that matter. His interests and Snoke's interests coincide with the First Order's in a nice way, a handshake between the two of them, but more importantly her inclusion in that reality isn't an impossibility. He knows that even as the cabinet's doors settling into the idle hold of their hinges, as the room grows quiet following the slight manifestation of his emotions. He tries to will himself into a calmer focus. It doesn't entirely work. ) You've made it abundantly clear that you aren't interested in accepting my offer to teach you. Including you seems like a moot point.
no subject
Why haven't you improved your lightsaber? I know you could. It's too unpredictable. [ Like you are. Like I am. Footnotes to her curious but well meant question, Rey unintentionally shifts a few scattered images across at him, like pressing a handful of photographs across an empty table, a small change here, tightening a bolt here, a little re-wiring there. Luke Skywalker has shown her how to construct a lightsaber, only one demonstration being enough for Rey to catch on, remembering the subdued swell of surprised pleasure in the Jedi's mood at her success. Her suggestions lack force or superiority, a mechanic simply offering their input to make something more successful, despite the irony of potentially giving an enemy the upper hand on her in a fight.
Only— Rey realizes with a private start that she hasn't considered Kylo Ren the enemy in weeks. Even this conversation, the both of them restless and awake but civil, leaves her quietly reeling, tucking away this gentle ebb of surprise somewhere he can't quite see. Just because she's not actively loathing him doesn't mean she trusts him at all, too connected, too deeply woven into the First Order for any kind of comfort ( still— she's under the impression that isn't his first priority. And neither is hunting her down. ) ]
no subject
Define improve.
( The innards so exposed, he switches tools to begin working on cleaning the crossguard vent, worried that the damage she had done in cutting the damn thing nearly in two on Starkiller might have affected the quillon that hadn't taken the brute force of her momentary ferocity. The memory is not so distant that he can't recall it in acute detail now, the tight set of her shoulders and the blue, jagged beam of his grandfather's saber in her hand washing her in bright light as he lay in the snow. The self-loathing and anger directed both inward and outward had come later, had wrecked medbay and killed a deck officer.
He's a touch calmer in the days and weeks since, that much more so when concentrating on the task at hand: a tricky balance with her in his mind as if she's always been there. That thought in itself is disconcerting, as are the implications behind it. Kylo pops a bit of grit out of the crossguard vent and blows sharply into the apparatus to clear it of any remaining detritus. )
It's served me just fine in place of the lightsaber that you stole from me. ( He gets the impression both from her and instinctively that she would be good at this, catching flits of images of her hands, small and stained, fitting pieces together with ease, a mechanic's intuition that affords her a measure of superiority that he never had, obvious in the instability of the blade he carries now. When he pops the shroud back on in a way that doesn't compromise the internal wiring the way it had after he'd repaired it, Kylo only stops to consider the possible source as Rey for no longer than it takes to be rid of it. He swallows and starts on the other emitter, annoyed and angry. ) It worked fine when that friend of yours got in my way, at least.
( The opposite emitter shroud pops off with a loud click! in the silence of the room. )
no subject
It duels viciously with the reverberating memory of Finn's hollow screams through a snowy wood, ripping her back to consciousness only to watch him be sliced up the spine cleanly in one fell swoop, seeing red in her vision, the primal, instinctual drive to stand and call that lightsaber to her hand. ]
Be. Careful, Ren. I didn't steal anything. If memory serves, this saber came to me, not you. And if you touch any of them again...
[ Her voice is a low growl knocking about his head, less angry and threatening as it is a promise. Too many long nights she'd spent, cheek pillowed across the bow of her own arm at his bedside, willing him to stir, to heal faster, to open his dark eyes and look at her and smile stupidly, BB-8 at her heels, Poe often on the other side of the bed, sleeping just as fitfully, impatient.
Poe doesn't so much speak about his time spent so very hospitably aboard the Finalizer, but there are glimpses she catches from him, shoulder to shoulder in the mess hall, or when his palm fits comfortably over the backs of her knuckles, and she knows. This bond between them will not make her less forgiving.
Still, even as she grumbles irritably around his head, her presence is an even, calm entity, nearly beside him, as if she's in her sleeping clothes and slumped across the table from him, giving him half hearted cranky little directions. ]
no subject
So he tempers the urge to encourage her down into a tiny flicker of amusement. It's easily disguised and easily cast off once his attention turns back to the task at hand: a steady balance of the pieces of his saber spread across from him and the intrusion of her in his mind, which tips more in her favor when she opens her mouth across the channel again and catches him cold. The tool in his hand skips over a ridge in his saber and something catches and pulls, springs free and rolls onto the floor and under the table. Kylo calls it back to him with no amount of gentleness, with such force that the little piece smacks into his hand with more speed than necessary. He fumes, to say the least. )
Making hollow threats like that is pointless. It's only a matter of time before we all cross paths again, and we are actually on opposite sides.
( In the case of FN-2187, Kylo intends to right the wrong he was unable to last time. Treason isn't something tolerated in any branch of the First Order, and given what his betrayal had cost the Order, had cost the Supreme Leader, had cost Kylo, he has every intention of seeing the proper amount of retaliation carried out. Her calmness, in the meantime, that neutral state she slips back into as if willing herself there purposefully under the banner of that heavy threat of 'or else,' unnerves him, especially when imposed upon him in such a way that he can't shake free.
He sets his teeth against the inside of his cheek and focuses on reassembling his saber, reluctant to believe that his quick reconstruction is at all due to her presence and the half-hearted attempts at guidance she affords him without either of them being acutely aware of it. He's quiet for a long time until finally the last piece clicks back into place and he busies himself with the task of replacing the tools into the pouch. It isn't until he's beyond the viewport and tucking the tool kit back into the drawer that he casts out for her again with a certain amount of directness. )
What do you want?
no subject
And so, she's quiet as he meticulously reassembles his lightsaber, careful as he puts his tools back in their proper places, his mind oddly quiet until she can feel that invisible nudge, a firm question with far less bite yet still demanding an answer. It gives her pause, blinking up at the starless ceiling above her, still jarring to wake some nights with a proper roof over her head. ]
I'm not sure. [ It doesn't bother her to admit, the voice in his mind muted and quiet, contemplative. ] You're just... here. It's easy. [ —to talk like this, a habit Rey fully realized and accepts is bother risky and dangerous, a novice brand of confidence keeping her from being too frightened by the prospect of slipping over to his side. Curiously, she shifts the very same question back to him, momentarily stunned by the broad expanse of endless space when he approaches the viewport once more. It isn't to retrieve any hidden information for the Resistance, or for his mother, but rather something she's wanted to know since this all began, a hooded, menacing terror in her vision, come to life in a shrouded wood. ]
What do you want? You don't really seem the type for galactic domination. You seem to have your own agenda. Including me in it also doesn't seem out of the question for you yet.
no subject
He hardly concerns himself with any of it, sticking to his quarters the way he typically does on long journeys, emerging only to see that Hux hasn't ruined something else in an effort to get them all disciplined. The silence he's granted affords him time to recollect following his disasters on Starkiller and Jakku, in dealing with Rey and losing the droid, to reevaluate all of his mistakes and failures so that they do not happen again. He uses the time away from the bridge to gather to him what he might say to the Supreme Leader, what reasons he might give for the choices that he made. Hux had warned him not to let his personal interests interfere with orders, but he had, and he knows that. It's a crime that he will absolutely be punished for, even if he was attempting to kill two birds with one stone without knowing it. Retrieve the map and bring Snoke a girl with more Force-sensitivity than he had ever encountered.
He'd neglected to do both, and now he has her in his head, flitting around like a bird, keeping him awake through the night cycle and peppering him with questions, offering guidance and suggestions in mechanics. He presses his mouth into a thin line, and the door to the cabinet slams. )
My suggestion is that you find a way to make me not here, unless you're interested in what happens as a result. ( She's right, of course. Not in so many ways but in the ones that matter. His interests and Snoke's interests coincide with the First Order's in a nice way, a handshake between the two of them, but more importantly her inclusion in that reality isn't an impossibility. He knows that even as the cabinet's doors settling into the idle hold of their hinges, as the room grows quiet following the slight manifestation of his emotions. He tries to will himself into a calmer focus. It doesn't entirely work. ) You've made it abundantly clear that you aren't interested in accepting my offer to teach you. Including you seems like a moot point.